Yesterday I wrote about how I'd been sleeping well, and feeling less ill, and more hopeful.
About 2 hours later I was on the floor of a clinic, shaking and sweating, and coming back into consciousness.
I went in to get blood work done, I was feeling brave, and nearly excited because I was pretty sure itd lead to a B12 deficiency diagnosis which would lead to monthly booster shots in the ass fixing all my symptoms. Instead, something about the vacuum in the vile vs. the scrawniness of my veins..she ruptured my vein, and the injection site was instantly swollen to the size of an egg. AN EGG! And then for some ridiculous reason we were discussing trying the OTHER arm, and then I was coming back into consciousness on some clinic floor.
THAT'S what I get for being hopeful? I mean, really? Good Christ.
I don't understand why Ive been so sick for so long in the first place, but what I REALLY don't understand, is why Life, or karma, or God, or whoeverthehell insists on also making sure that I remain hopeless, and sick.
I didn't sleep last night because I was too nauseous, and there is so much pain in the bottom of my stomach. And you know, only I could consume 4 Imodium and eat nearly nothing in 24 hours and still be able to rush to the bathroom. Only me.
Perhaps I could take comfort in the fact that at least I am unique.
:)
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